Let me begin by saying this... Even though I know I am supposed to be here, I still wrestle with my desires to be in other places. When something doesn't go my way, or when I don't understand, I get these thoughts inside my head that repeat like a skipping CD, "It would be so much better in this other place. I don't want to be here anymore. I want to do x, not this." At the same time these thoughts go through my head, I look around and see the people, the ministry and what I am doing and love it. I know God is using me and I love being His vessel.
So, this morning, I was frustrated with my double-mindedness and asked God to take it from me. God said, "No." Knowing that He wasn't done speaking to this, I continued to listen. Here is what He led me to discover.
This double-mindedness is just proof that I live for another home. America or any other place I go or want to go is not my home. His heart is the place that I will live forever. My double-mindedness is just the calling to live as a sojourner in the land. I am to look at the patriarchs of the Bible (Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, Moses) as my example. They never really settled into their promised land (a literal location) until their hearts were at home with the Lord.
I read Hebrews 11:8-27 this morning with new insight. Even once these patriarchs lived in the land of Israel, they new it was not their true, permanent location. They lived knowing that God Himself was their inheritance; to be with Him is their permanent location. When they were homesick, it was for heaven, not the place they left. I want to live like them.
The patriarchs looked to the Messiah as their encouragement to throw away their pleasures and to endure hardship- including homesickness. They truly fixed their eyes on Him. Worship is fixing our eyes on God (with or without music). Worship is the place where we 'leave' this earth and its pleasures behind. It's the place where we experience the superior pleasure of knowing God.
I have a new definition of what it means to be a missionary now. A missionary is one who looks to God as his/her inheritance. One who looks to God to come down but knows He won't return forever (i.e. Second Coming) until He is made at home in another's heart. Missionary. Sojourner on this earth. One who lives to be in heaven more than in a nation.
In this way, we can all be missionaries, right where we are at. The Lord Himself is my home.
Excerpts from Hebrews 11:8-27 Amplified Version
8[Urged on] by faith Abraham, when he was called, obeyed and went forth to a place which he was destined to receive as an inheritance; and he went, although he did not know or trouble his mind about where he was to go.
9[Prompted] by faith he dwelt as a temporary resident in the land which was designated in the promise [of God, though he was like a stranger] in a strange country, living in tents with Isaac and Jacob, fellow heirs with him of the same promise.(D)
10For he was [waiting expectantly and confidently] looking forward to the city which has fixed and firm foundations, whose Architect and Builder is God.
13These people all died controlled and sustained by their faith, but not having received the tangible fulfillment of [God's] promises, only having seen it and greeted it from a great distance by faith, and all the while acknowledging and confessing that they were strangers and temporary residents and exiles upon the earth.(G)
14Now those people who talk as they did show plainly that they are in search of a fatherland (their own country).
15If they had been thinking with [homesick] remembrance of that country from which they were emigrants, they would have found constant opportunity to return to it.
16But the truth is that they were yearning for and aspiring to a better and more desirable country, that is, a heavenly [one]. For that reason God is not ashamed to be called their God [even to be surnamed their God--the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob], for He has prepared a city for them.(H)
17By faith Abraham, when he was put to the test [while the testing of his faith was [d]still in progress], [e]had already brought Isaac for an offering; he who had gladly received and welcomed [God's] promises was ready to sacrifice his only son,(I)
18Of whom it was said, Through Isaac shall your descendants be reckoned.(J)
19For he reasoned that God was able to raise [him] up even from among the dead. Indeed in the sense that Isaac was figuratively dead [potentially sacrificed], he did [actually] receive him back from the dead.
20[With eyes of] faith Isaac, looking far into the future, invoked blessings upon Jacob and Esau.(K)
21[Prompted] by faith Jacob, when he was dying, blessed each of Joseph's sons and bowed in prayer over the top of his staff.(L)
22[Actuated] by faith Joseph, when nearing the end of his life, referred to [the promise of God for] the departure of the Israelites out of Egypt and gave instructions concerning the burial of his own bones.(M)
23[Prompted] by faith Moses, after his birth, was kept concealed for three months by his parents, because they saw how comely the child was; and they were not overawed and terrified by the king's decree.(N)
24[Aroused] by faith Moses, when he had grown to maturity and [f]become great, refused to be called the son of Pharaoh's daughter,(O)
25Because he preferred to share the oppression [suffer the hardships] and bear the shame of the people of God rather than to have the fleeting enjoyment of a sinful life.
26He considered the contempt and abuse and shame [borne for] the Christ (the Messiah Who was to come) to be greater wealth than all the treasures of Egypt, for he looked forward and away to the reward (recompense).
27[Motivated] by faith he left Egypt behind him, being unawed and undismayed by the wrath of the king; for he never flinched but held staunchly to his purpose and endured steadfastly as one who gazed on Him Who is invisible.(P)
Great post. I wish more people knew that they are missionaries wherever they are. We are all priests and should act as such at all times.
ReplyDelete