Friendship

Recently, I was reading an old journal where the Lord spoke to me about friendship.  Apparently, I had been setting up rules by which to live by-both in my relationship with Him and others.

"Friendship has a different authority structure.  Friendship is motivated by love or desires-whether for the other person involved or for the direction of the relationship.  Little Lamb, I want a friendship with you.  The authority of a friendship comes because you just want to be with Me.  That's what I want to develop in you: that you are content to just be with Me.  I love you dearly and want to befriend you.  Lean into My love and I'll hold you like a friend does.  Let go of legalism and just love Me.  Let your love for Me set the standards by which you live."

In 2010, I had an unending social life.  My job as a teacher was filled with people; I'd come home to my best friends and roommates; I'd go to church with friends; I had small group meetings with friends.  Even a visit to my favorite coffee shop resulted in visits with friends.

In the Philippines, I learned to let go of the convenience of friendships and treat the Lord as a friend in a new way.  For a season, I felt so lonely and God was my only comfort.

But, I was also surrounded by people that became my friends.  Communal living has a way of doing that.  I couldn't breathe without someone hearing me.  And I loved it.

Returning to America brought another change to my friendships.  There was a slight expectation that I'd have the social life I once did.  While I am still close to all the people I once spent my life with, our availability is not what it once was.  I no longer live with friends (I guess my dad could count, though).  I work in one-on-one tutoring capacity.  I am not able to attend the church functions I used to.  100% of my core group of previous socialites either got married or moved while I was overseas.

I am not complaining.  I am just stating.  Reading that old journal entry was a word in due season.  I don't live for friendships.  I live to show my love for Jesus.

I am so thankful the Lord used the Philippines to get loneliness out of me.  Jesus is my Forever Friend- no matter the circumstances.

If You'll be my Best Friend,

I'll be Yours.

No matter the country,

You are there for me.

Convenience is nothing.

You never leave.

And so, to You, I'll always cleave.